A Lesson in Parenting
by whitticisms
Summary: Another Boy Meets World Parody! This time, Ron is being taught by Hermione how to raise a family properly after he lets the child she was babysitting stay up too late. Meanwhile, Fred is having girl oriented problems of his own...
1. Cast of Characters

Cast of Characters 

A/N: Here's my second Boy Meets World meets Harry Potter fic! This is NOT a sequel to Detention with McGonnagall. On the contrary, this episode of Boy Meets World happened a year or so before the Scream one.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even the computer I'm typing this on. It's my parents.

Cory Matthews: Ron Weasley  
  
Shawn Hunter: Harry Potter  
  
Topanga Lawrence: Hermione Granger  
  
Eric Matthews: Fred Weasley  
  
Alan Matthews: George Weasley (you'll understand)  
  
Amy Matthews: Mrs. Weasley  
  
Corrina: Luna Lovegood

Morgan: Natalie Weasley (full explanation later in the story)

Billy Epperson: Trevor Malloy

Mr. Feeny: Professor McGonnagall

Mr. and Mrs. Epperson: Mr. and Mrs. Malloy

A/N: Now that that's over, I can start the story!


	2. Chapter 1

A/N: Here it is!  
  
Disclaimer: Nothing's changed since the last story I wrote.  
  
Chapter 1  
  
Fred Weasley shoved his hands deeper into his pockets as he walked quickly to get to the joke shop he owned with his twin brother George in the heart of Hogsmeade. As he neared the store a happy voice floated toward him. Then he saw a girl a bit younger than him singing and strumming on her guitar right outside the door of the joke shop.

"I dreamed a day like this, when children laugh and play like this, and the sun shine's just for me, and I feel good!" the young woman sang happily, as an older man standing close by looked at her in disgust.  
  
"Make it stop!" he told Fred, trying to put his heavily gloved hands over his ears. Fred payed no attention, however.  
  
"And the sun shine's just for me and I feel good!" the girl repeated, just as happy as before now that she had more of an audience. Fred threw several random coins into her open guitar case and started to enter Weasley Wizard Wheezes.  
  
"A handsome passerby throws me four shiny galleons-" she began, striking up a new, yet happy tune. Fred pauses at the door, then turns around.  
  
"Whoa," he said, and took back his money, with the exception of the several knuts and sickles that he had also thrown in. The girl seemed unperturbed at this. On the contrary, she continued to sing.  
  
"And the sun shine's just for me, and I feel good!" she sang again. Fred walked into the store.  
  
"Close the door! Will you please close it?" George shouted from the counter. Fred smiled.

"Aww, what's the matter bro, a little too perky for you out there this morning?" Fred said teasingly. The girl continued singing, just as happy as before as Fred closed it.  
  
"Nobody's come in here. She's scared all the customers away!" George complained. Fred considered this, then decided to be optimistic.  
  
"Well, would you rather have the smelly old guy who used to spit on people?" Fred asked, smiling.  
  
"Yeah! Yeah! Get him. Go get him and get rid of her!" George told him.  
  
"Me? Why me?" Fred asked, feeling like he was getting the harder job.  
  
"Because we're equal partners in this business, and its my turn to be behind the counter today and you have to do what I tell you to do," George said proudly, loving being in charge. Fred considered this.  
  
"Well, as long as I know the rules," Fred said, and with that, he turned around and left the store to talk to the girl.  
  
"Feel the warmth. Can you feel it? Can you feel it, it's warm? It's warm and I feel good!" The girl sang cheerfully, giving an aura that no black cloud could ruin her day. Fred bent down to speak to her.  
  
"Excuse me, miss, I'm really sorry, but could you just..." Fred began solidly, but suddenly, the girl (Luna Lovegood, who had recently taken up a new interest in music) looked into his eyes, and it hit Fred how pretty she was. She continued singing.  
  
"And the sun shine's just for me..." she repeated, again, not losing any of her pleasantness.

"...And I feel good," she sang, and Fred joined in as he dropped the rest of his money into her guitar case. He turned to reenter the store wearing a dazed, yet happy expression.

"So it's done?" George asked, eyeing Fred suspiciously.  
  
"Ahh, of course it's not done, I mean, don't you know me at all? Why would you send me to do something like that?" Fred asked him.  
  
"She smiled at you?" George said, beginning to smile at the situation himself.  
  
"Ghey-Hea!" Fred said as what he thought was an acceptable answer. Luckily, George understood.  
  
"All right, look. Take her to lunch and ask her to take her act further down the road. Can you handle that?" George asked seriously.  
  
"Ha! Can I handle that? Yeah, I can handle that or fail to do so. But I'm going to need some money, so, can you give me some, cause I gave her all of mine." Fred said, as George pulled out his wallet.  
  
A/N: So, there's the first chapter! Has everyone caught on to what episode it is yet? It's happens to be another one of my favorites! Next chapter VERY soon!!


	3. Chapter 2

A/N: Now is when the title and summary sort of all comes together...  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own it yet...  
  
Chapter 2  
  
Harry and Ron were bored. McGonnagall was rambling. Hermione was paying attention as though her life depended on it. So, business as usual. Harry and Ron perked up when McGonnagall had said 'it,' 'It' had been the only word they had really been able to understand throughout the lecture. McGonnagall had been lecturing the class on the importance of finally being able to vote for a new Minister of Magic (as Fudge had been considered an unsuitable leader after the war was over, a Democratic form of wizarding government had rose). The age of voting would be 17, a pinnacle which they would all reach after the election was over, unfortunately.  
  
"...And as this will be the last election in which you do not cast a ballot, I want this classroom to be an open forum to discuss the issues, which most concern your life. Mr. Potter, what issue most concerns your life?" McGonnagall shot at Harry, who had been on the verge of falling asleep, and sat up quickly to answer.  
  
"The swimsuit issue. How am I doing?" he asked seriously. McGonnagall rolled her eyes.  
  
"Bravo, Mr. Potter. Mr. Weasley?" she asked, turning to Ron, who had been paying attention, against his better judgement.  
  
"Ahh, yes, actually there is a pressing social matter, which I feel equipped to discuss with confidence and alacrity," Ron said, without missing a beat. McGonnagall looked as though she may go into a coma.  
  
"Well, you have the floor, Mr. Weasley," she said after taking a few deep breaths.  
  
"Nah, that used me up," Ron answered, and the color returned to McGonnagall's face. She turned to Hermione, who had been studying Ron as he spoke like it was his first piano recital, and she was his mother in the audience.  
  
"Save us, Miss Granger," she said, and Hermione obliged.  
  
"Well, first of all, I'd just like to say I think Ron's really cute for trying," she started, turning in her chair to look at Ron as she spoke.  
  
"Oh thank you sugar," Ron said proudly, and Hermione continued.  
  
"And, that I think the biggest crisis facing this world is the breakdown of the wizarding family," she said seriously. Harry gazed at her.  
  
"Oh. You always got to go after Harry," he said, acting genuinely hurt. Hemrione continued.  
  
"Well, I just think that lots of other issues, like crime and the decline in education..." she said with plenty of confidence and alacrity.  
  
"Hey, hey, lay off me!" Harry said, as though he couldn't believe she was insulting him.  
  
"...All have to do with the way we're brought up in our homes," she finished proudly. McGonnagall considered this.  
  
"Well, now I agree with you, Miss Granger," she said, proud of her student. Harry had had enough.  
  
"That's it," he said, as he got up and walked toward the door. Then he turned to McGonnagall.  
  
"Mr. Potter?" McGonnagall asked weakly. Harry pointed up at the bell (which does so exist in Hogwarts! If you don't believe me, read OOTP a couple of times) just as it rang.  
  
"Oh, that's it," McGonnagall said, as the class dismissed. Ron and Hermione followed Harry back to the common room.  
  
"Harry, you're not really upset, are you?" Ron asked.  
  
"What? That I'm personally responsible for the breakdown in wizarding society? Nah, I got bigger problems," he said.  
  
"I know, I got problems too. I mean, Hermione and I were supposed to go out tonight, but its not happening," he said, looking dissapointed. At this point, Hermione has dissapeared.  
  
"Oh well that's good. Now we got ourselves a rare guys night out. You and me. Two guys catching up," Harry said, looking happy at the thought.  
  
"All right, I'm in to that. The boys, together again. So, ah, it's a pretty lucky thing Hermione's babysitting tonight, huh?" Ron asked Harry. Harry looked at Ron.  
  
"Whoa, whoa, whoa. You have a girlfriend who's babysitting?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah, late into the night. So, chess or quidditch?" He asked Harry, still oblivious to everything Harry was piecing together.  
  
"Ron, there's no chess. There's no quidditch. There's just you and your girlfriend in a stranger's house, no interruptions, alone, on a couch..." Harry said, and comprehension dawned on Rons' face.  
  
"Ron Weasley, a parent's worst nightmare. Lock up your daughters, the hormones will be a flyin' tonight!" he said happily. "You believe me?" he asked Harry.  
  
"No, but you're very sweet," Harry said after considering him for a moment. They left the common room for their next class.  
  
A/N: Next chapter: How well did Fred's date go? Will he survive it? And will Ron crash Hermione's babysitting experience? If so, what will she do to make him suffer? All this and more will be answered if you review! 


	4. Chapter 3

A/N: All right…here's chapter 3! Merry Christmas :-P…Oh, before I forget…MINISCULE HBP spoilers in here…no use mentioning it because if you haven't read the book you probably won't even notice…just warning you…And one more thing…As this is an AU fanfiction, I've decided I can do whatever I want…so…Natalie Weasley (Morgan) will henceforth be known as Ginny Weasley, who will now be about nine years old, instead of fifteen…I apologize for the inconvience.

Chapter 3 

Madame Rosmerta heaved a long-suffering sigh as she briefly scanned her bar. As she bent her head back down towards the countertop, she absentmindedly ran her fingers over the crudely carved initials R.A.B. She had wondered for months what on earth they had been doing there…seemingly appearing overnight. Usually, Rosmerta knew everything that went on in her bar, and these initials being such a mystery to her…well, she didn't like that one bit.

As it were, there was another event occurring in her bar that point that she wasn't in favor of. She looked up, and her eyes immediately spotted a vivid mop of trademark red hair. Instantly, she knew it was a Weasley, or rather, a Weasley twin. Which one it was, would remain a mystery, however. _Never could tell them apart,_ she thought to herself grudgingly. She was extremely put out now they had left school. Rosmerta always looked forward to Fred and George's frequent secret Hogsmeade visits (though she had always wondered how they managed to sneak out undetected). The two would come in wearing evil grins, weaving their way through tables towards the swivel chairs at the bar, their arms heavily laden by several bags of Zonko's Joke Shop merchandise. Once they reached the front of the bar they would relieve themselves of the bags and show her their purchases, always making her laugh at the stupidest things. Their visits became more and more infrequent as they left Hogwarts, and as they got their own premises for their own joke shop inside Hogsmeade. She missed the way they used to fill her bar with laughter with their rambunctious antics. At the moment however, as she stared at the back of Fred or George's head, she realized it wasn't him that was the life of the party (or in this case, date), but the small blonde girl sitting across from him, strumming on her guitar and singing along with it, her protuberant blue eyes never leaving his extremely withdrawn face.

"I got interested in music when I saw my first musical show," she told him, singing the words happily. Fred reached out and grabbed her hands to stop her from attempting to play anymore.

"Luna, Luna, talk. Use your words. Its okay to just talk," he said, exasperated. Luna obliged. He let go of her hands and slouched back in his seat on the other side of the table, resuming his sulk, which had yet to be noticed by Luna.

"Oh, okay. Well, I saw _Annie,_ and when that little girl sang "The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow," I felt like she was talking to me!" She told Fred, her voice dripping with sticky sweetness.

"Well, did she maybe mention that you should try to write something with a little more edge?" he asked her, genuinely interested in her answer. She put on a face.

"You sound just like my uncle at the record company!" Fred's jaw dropped. Who on earth would give this girl a record deal? And who the hell was Annie?

"You have a record deal!" He asked her. _If this girl can get a record deal, Percy could_, he thought.

"Not yet. Uncle Leroy says I don't have enough edge. He seems to think I don't have enough life experience yet," she answered, apparently growing slowly offended by her uncle's opinions about her music. Fred thought he had her here.

"That must've really out you in a bad mood. Brought you down. Put you in a dark place," he told her, now very hopeful in the way the conversation was going. That is, until Luna started laughing at him. "You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?" He asked her.

"No. I just do what I always do. I put my feelings into a song," she told him cheerfully. At that moment, inspiration seemed to hit again, because she immediately groped for he guitar and began another song. "Thank you Uncle David, for listening to my song, and only taking two calls, and I'll try to be more edgy. But I can't right now, because I'm looking at a, dandelion, dandelion." The disastrous date continues…

Meanwhile at Trevor Malloy's house… 

Hermione is listening attentively to Trevor's mother, who is giving instructions for how the night should go. Trevor's parents are heading toward the door as they are giving the explanations, and Hermione is seeing them out.

"Now Hermione, Trevor's bedtime is…" Mrs. Malloy began to quiz Hermione.

"Nine o'clock sharp," Hermione answered promptly, not breaking a sweat. This was going to be a piece of cake! Mrs. Malloy was relentless, however.

"And the emergency brooms are…" She asked, as though she was hoping to stump Hermione, which was going to be difficult, as Hermione hadn't been stumped since the classroom geography bee in 2nd grade. Just thinking of the memory made her squirm with disappointment.

"…Standing next to the back door," she said, relieved. Mrs. Malloy kept going.

"And…" Mrs. Malloy trailed off expectantly.

"No boys," Hermione answered solemnly.

"And…"

"No boys at all," she added. Hermione began to reach for the doorknob. She turned it and pulled it toward her to reveal Ron. Ron, quickly realizing why everyone was staring at him, picked up the nearest butterbeer jug.

"Butterbeer delivery guy," he said lamely, knowing perfectly well they don't exist. Mrs. Malloy's reaction was the complete opposite of what he had been expecting, however. Hermione, who had been holding her breath since the moment Ron appeared on the doorstep immediately jumped in front of Ron to block him from view.

"Don't worry. He's not staying. I know your rules. No boys," she told the Malloy's. She spun around to look at Ron. "What are you doing here?" She whispered to him.

"Oh, Hermione. When I said 'no boys' I didn't mean this kind of boy," she told Hermione. She turned to her husband, who had been acting as a wall decoration up until that moment. "This is Molly and Arthur's little boy," she informed him.

"Uh-huh," came his response. Apparently he didn't find this conversation quite as exciting as his wife did. Ron, however, was very interested, and was puzzled by this comment. No one thought he was dangerous?

"Molly and Arthur's 'dangerous' little boy," he amended, also offended by this comment. Mr. Malloy replied, still maintaining his monotonous tone.

"We're all dangerous in the beginning." Ron cocked his head to one side as though trying to more closely examine him. 'All dangerous in the beginning?' What was that supposed to mean? Ron snapped back to attention when Mrs. Malloy began talking again. She was, after all, his new hero. For letting him stay. Nothing to do with the sexy red dress she was currently fashioning.

"We'll be out late. If you two get tired, just take a little nap on the couch." She smiled at Ron, who was watching her with his mouth hanging slightly open. Then she abruptly turned to her husband, as the waiting for him to comment on the situation.

"Very comfortable couch. Lie down on it, you'll think you're dead. It's wonderful." Ron and Hermione tried not to look too disturbed by this as the showed the two parents out. When the door was closed, Hermione leaned against it, as though she had just been through an exhausting ordeal. Then her eyes lit up on Ron.

"I'm glad you came over, 'dangerous boy.' Why don't you get all dangerous on the couch and I'll get us something to eat?" She told Ron, who immediately obliged and watched her as she pranced into the kitchen. He turned his attention to the couch when she disappeared. _Wow, the nutter was right. Lie down in it, you think you're dead. It's wonderful!_

"All right, all right. Cozy couch, empty house. Everything is working out according to plan. What could possibly go wrong?" Ron said to himself as he leaned back on the couch, putting his arm behind his head as he spoke. The next thing he felt was a small finger being stuck in his ear…

A/N: Can't really call this a cliffhanger if you've already seen the show. If you haven't, and don't understand anything I've been talking about, I strongly recommend you tune into ABC family on weekdays at 3:00 pm, or, if you're an insomniac, Disney channel at like, 1:30 am.


End file.
